Another Day and Boom!

 

                    

                                                     

This cutie pie just turned 81

Can't hardly believe it. Funny thing is when I turned 80 last year I felt the same way. Honestly on the inside I see myself in my mid to late 30's. Of course when I look in the mirror reality strikes and I think it's my Mother for a mini instant. Or....who is that woman in the mirror. I'm sure most women look in the mirror as the years go by and say similar things.

The thing is, that doesn't change a thing. Birthdays still come, pass on by and here comes another one. Of course in the human way to think it's a good thing but in the spiritual sense, well I'll just say there's a far better place I will be someday.

The older I get the more important eternity becomes and I'm every so glad I know where I will be when this earth suit no longer works and those that are still here will be stuck with a small box of ashes. But as for me, I'll be long gone with a new forever suit to wear that never wears out or gets sick or anything like what I've faced when my feet were on the earth.  One way or another that shouldn't be too much longer.

Now that was kinda morbid. I didn't mean it like that but it's true. I never use to think of it that way but as the years, I mean the recent years are moving on up it is something I do consider from time to time.

As for now, heres an encouraging thing for me to say. So far the 80's are a good number at least for me. I'm content in my life and though a widow life is really good. I have my new kitty "Joey" a teen aged orange tabby as my room mate. He's pretty cool for a cat.

And the rest of my life is pretty full. I live in a nice place, and apartment complex with good neighbors, I go to a good little church and facilitate a class for widows...that's new. I have family near and they are all fun and a great grand baby girl in a different state but I get to watch her on my phone. She'll be a year old shortly.

I stay pretty busy and I still spend time in my craft room and give a way what I make or use it myself. I gave my good friend some painted rocks for her prayer garden. Two lady bugs and tuo pretty beetles. I took them to her today just for grins. Every Tuesday is the widows group so I study and prepare a lesson of sorts for that, print handouts for the hour long meeting. It's a small group for now. 

I move a bit slower than I used to but I move. I do have a few plants outside and since there aren't any water faucets around I water them by hand daily, so they are cared for. I got two purple patoonia hanging pots and you have to dead head (take off the dead flowers) them everyday. They hang outon the back porch and then there are a couple of spider plants in the front in the shade and a few small plants in the little strip of garden area at the front and that's enough anyway.

That's it for now. My friend Nancy made a lemon cake with lemon frosting for my Birthday Cake and it was yummy. Got a gift card from my daughter from Hobby Lobby so I went shopping the next day and bought stuff for my craft room.

Tomorrow is Good Friday so I'll go to the service in the evening and then Suday it'll be Resurrection Sunday and then dinner at the daughters with more family. Hope all have a blessed celebration this weekend. It's really early in the am and I need to sleep so, nite nite and God Bless each and everyone. I'm Judy in the cottage with Joey sleeping right next to me. Sleep tight and goodnight.

You Knew

 You Knew

You saw me look at his closed eyes,

That very instant I lost myself

But you knew where I put me.

My Daughters were watching me

And I was just fine

I cried out to you but had nothing to say 

And you knew the words I didn’t speak

 I Iost me right then

You knew where I left me

I wasn’t really lost just thought I was gone

 I was upset and beside myself 

you calmed me down and let me cry

The days passed and I didn’t know them

I wasn’t there to watch them go

You knew it all along and held my hand but I 

Didn’t notice you were even there

You were there when I knew he wasn’t

I thought I saw him the other day but it wasn’t him at all

I ran toward my memories but I couldn’t  see him anywhere.

Where was he anyway when he is not with me

Is he hunting or fishing or on his way

I cannot find him anywhere

 

You knew I lost me 

 even where I put me, 

You knew where I was all along

You didn’t forget me though I thought I did

You’ve loved me through it all.

Here I am again this time with you

I didn’t know it at the time

But I know it now

You are where I’m meant to be

I miss him every day 

But I must say

I love you more than I can even think to say

Because it’s you who will never leave me.

It’s you who holds my heart, it’s always been that way

My maker and my redeemer, with you I’m meant to be.

By Judy Chase

A few years ago there was a beautiful worship song "Defender" buy Jesus Culture of which I may have used some of the words and concept of the song in this poem. This poem bounces off my memory of that song and though I don't remember the song itself I want to give honor to those who wrote it and performed it for the inspiration of "You Knew".  

The Kick Off

A couple of posts back I talked about a new ministry that I was going to organize to start in the Spring. Yesterday was the Kick Off for "A Widows Window" a support group in my church for widows. After many team meetings the class turned out very well. Got some good feed back. And, it's a GO! Had originally set it up for 6 weeks for starters but thinking I need to expand it until the first of August. So, every Tuesday at 10 am until August 1st...my gut feeling is it's gonna grow.

A beautiful thing happened during the gathering of the few widows that came. A couple of them shared about the death of their husband. Though it was truly difficult to hear, when each spoke of that experience there was a measure of love that almost glowed as they spoke. It was amazing to be there with them as they went through their heart and memory. A quiet attention of everyone in the room as each one shared.

No doubt a very difficult time in life but...God revealed himself in each story and it was beautiful. I am awed by the evidence of the love of God that carries us through and we are unaware for the most part because of the pain of our loss. I truly honor the women who have lived through such a devastating life experience and know they were carried even as they are sharing their heart.

I'm thankful that I get to be part of this ministry. I know this is a short post, but in a since it's fuller than maybe all the others put together.

God bless you.  This is Judy, in my red recliner hoping you believe in Creator of all things created, the Alpha and Omega, His Son Jesus the Christ and Holy Spirit.

                                                               

                                                               Daffodils...it must be Spring

Home

 

Joey learned to watch TV while I was gone from home.

It's March! The 5th to be exact and I'm Home. Sometimes that word gets a super charge in it's meaning. That's the case today. Though my living companion is Joey the orange tabby, he's part of the reason home means more than usual. Another reason home means more to me today is that I've been away since February 17th and came home this past Saturday morning 16 days according to my fingers. First it was early morning hospital sign in then time in a staging area with a curtain waiting for my turn in surgery. Then flat on my tummy on a special table I'm told for the lower 4 & 5 spine fusion. Five hours later woke up in ICU where I stayed until released to a rehab facility for a week. Then finally home to Joey.

I have staples in my lower back and a second incision a bit to the left for a special tool used in the process.  A bit soar with lots of rules for not moving in such a way to damage the incision. And a walker.  The worst of it all is over I think. In a couple of days I go see the surgeon for a post op appointment and probably removal of the staples of which there are plenty.

Experiencing all sorts of sensations not necessarily pain. Hope the Surgeon has a good explanation for all of them and hope it's normal. So, having said that I'm determined not to worry about those sensations for now. Lots of things happen to a body during surgery that no one really talks about. For instance once your body is opened up air enters. The air can cause pockets throughout your body like bubbles. That's why when you wake up after they....the nurses or someone...gets you on your feet and makes you walk so that the air will leave. Interesting!

Lots of other things happen too. I woke up to bruises in the oddest places. Some are obviously from the needles they place under the skin for stuff that needs to get into the blood stream in  a hurry. But some are of unknown origin to me. I have questions for the doc.. I don't know abut you but I don't like the idea that I'm 'handled' while unconscious though I do give permission. I don't think about it too much.

Well, I'm home now and today at 9 a home health person comes to tell me how they will help me for the next 2 weeks. Don't know what to expect but I'll be happy with whatever is offered.

While I was in hospital etc., Joey was being visited everyday for a minimum of an hour. During that hour he was entertained and entertaining, was loved on, fed and otherwise attended to. When I got home he was absolutely glad to see me but expected me to leave after an hour. To his surprise I'm still here and he has calmed down and is semi-calm for a 10 month old.

Home. I'm home. Kids come everyday to do a bit of housekeeping and check on me and bring stuff if I have need or want. Otherwise I stay in my robe and slippers. Now that's something that sounds good but not so much. It's to be expected though so since I don't have the energy to do much more than sit in the recliner, I'm good.

The main thing is, I'm Home.

yup...Judy at home in the recliner in her robe and slippers posting. Hope all are well and really like your Home. Bless you each and every one!

You know it's February When...

 That's me alright...I volunteered to do a craft for children's church because this is missions' month and a missionary from Vietnam is coming and they needed a craft the kids can do having to do with that country, so I volunteered and chose to make a hat the farmers and regular people wear in the fields and around town. This is my first try at figuring out how to do that!!! 

This month of February is packed full of things to do and I'm already exhausted! Not only the craft that I will help the kids within March (it's in this mix because I started working on it in February). 

I also volunteered to organize a support group for widows in my local church and I started that last month, and it actually starts in March. However, guess who busy figuring it is all out and getting volunteers to help and writing and copying and handing out copies and keeping the leadership advised and holding meetings weekly.... on and on and on.

Not only am I doing the organizing and meetings but will be speaking most of the 10 sessions when it starts in March. Of course, that means writing 20-minute presentations for possibly 6 total of the 10. The thing is I absolutely love the challenge and the process, though it does have challenges now and again. I believe the outcome is going to be great. 

And then there's the back surgery scheduled for the 17th in the mix of all the above of which I may be laid up for 3 days but not driving plus using a walker for some time. And not picking up more than 5lbs. Ugh! While attending the sessions and giving presentations every Tuesday for 10 weeks. No worries with the surgery though, the arrangements are made to feed the cat Joey and pet him a while. Family will be with me in the hospital through however many days I stay. Hoping if any it's 1. Plus checking in on me at home until I'm self-sufficient. Oh, forgot I'm not supposed to drive either. 

BTW just so you know the name of the group is "A Widow's Window". I just passed my 19th year and thought it would be a piece of cake. Silly me! It does bring up memories, but I think they are helpful in this process. Nothing I cry about, but I do remember and actually it's helping as I work with other volunteers who will be facilitating with me and also in writing my own presentations. This is tough though for those I hope will attend as well as those of us who are also widows and are preparing our testimonies of how through God, we are alive and well.

I must admit that in my effort to start from nothing except my own clerical experience along with past organizing many different kinds of people gatherings I just jumped in and started typing. It's just now that I came across an article about how to start a widow's group for the purpose of support and helps for those like me. I have new information to add to what is already in place and one thing is that I can see that the group I have envisioned is much too limited and someday will be lengthened to more than just one hour. But though I didn't see that, I've kind of figured that would come in time. I do believe that what will be the first attempt at such a ministry at my church will grow into the kind of group I just read about, and I hope that it does. In the meantime, I'm geared for what has evolved in the planning and team building stage and hope it will be the start of a fruitful ministry for the widows in our congregation today and those in the future.

Hope with me, will you?  This is Judy at my computer working on getting ready for tomorrows team meeting for "A Widow's Window". God Bless you One and All.

Marching Orders-proof 80 is not too old for new things!

 

A new selfie!

2025 and new is happening. I'm so thankful! Change is everywhere and seems to be a really good thing.

I get to help build a widows ministry at the small church I go to and I'm very excited about it. In fact it's an answer to prayer for me. I lost my footing when I lost my husband and thus my life. Everything in my life was put in a brown paper grocery bag and severely shaken and when the contents were poured out it has taken years to re-organize all those bits and pieces.  It's actually been 19 years. I've made several attempts to get back into some semblance of normality but it just hasn't happened until now.  In 1987 my beloved and I began life in full time ministry as pastors. We were in our very early 40's at that time and our family was grown and on their own so it was just the two of us.  I lost all of that in the beginning of 2006 when my husband left this earth.

It wasn't as though we had life long friends in the ministry so I really didn't have any ministerial connections to continue life as a licensed minister. Therefor it just fell off the world and me with it. Just didn't seem to be a place for me and I felt like a has-been/never-to-be again. No matter what door I knocked on no one answered. Time. I believe it was all about time, and now it's time! 

One problem I see is that I'm not really outgoing or a self starter in the manner needed to be bold enough to push and push for something.  Even if I truly believe in it when it comes to getting positive encouragement versus negative results. So I've tried a little here and a little there throughout these years and finally I appear to have a green light that will use my giftings and abilities in the church. I'm delighted and hope I actually get it done with the help of others. Leadership is a funny thing ya know...if no one is following then guess what? You aren't a leader!

I'm in the early stages and am building a team to get the ministry done by early Spring. So much to do and so much information to gather and all the ways and means need to be in writing pretty quickly and ready to go in just a few short weeks. But...I believe it can be done and there may be things that need to be tweaked along the way but I truly think it's gonna be a really good addition to this small church, and even the community.

It's truly a new opportunity in so very many ways.  A New year, New President, New possibilities for this year both in my world and in my life and I hope that's true for you. It's good to dream and it's good to have aspirations and hope for the rest of today and tomorrow. The beginning of a new year is perfect for all the ideas of the past and maybe it's time for old hopes to be refreshed and take this opportunity to consider new possibilities for old dreams....Just a thought.

Happy January 2025...I'm still Judy and still writing. God bless you and your new endeavors whatever they may be.  

2025 changing of the year!